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What Is Internal Family Systems (IFS)?

The Internal Family Systems Self-leadership model was developed 30+ years ago by Richard Schwartz, Ph.D., LMFT. IFS is a tool for accelerated self-awareness and permanent emotional healing. IFS is not a theoretical solution; IFS is an evidence-based approach to understanding and healing the root causes of unresolved emotional issues rooted in childhood events. These childhood events contribute to present-day pain and suffering, especially in your romantic relationship.


The IFS Perspective:

We are Made Up of a Higher Self and Parts  

What is Higher Self in IFS Model?

Parts Act Up

When you hear yourself saying: 

  • “That’s not really me...”
  • “I don’t know what happened to me...”
  • “I did it again...”
  • “I didn’t mean to say that...”
  • “I meant to handle that situation differently...”
  • “I know that what I did was wrong, but I couldn’t stop myself...” 

This means one of your parts took over. It acted out of fear and reverted to old behaviors and protective strategies that they learned in childhood or early adulthood. The negative strategies were born out of limiting beliefs and fears that were programmed into you from adverse childhood experiences.

The IFS healing model guides you to understand and heal the parts of you that keep you stuck so they can relax from their undesirable thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. The goal of IFS therapy is to restore the inner leadership back to your Higher Self -- Self-leadership -- instead of having your parts run the show and wreak havoc in your relationship.

Learn More About Dr. Schwartz's IFS Model

Learn more about how parts can show up and wreak havoc in love and leadership in Emily's book.

About the Book (from the back cover):
Did you know that the same parts of a personality that contribute to insecurities, conflicts, and mediocrity in leadership are the same parts that contribute to unfulfilling and challenging romantic experiences, devoid of joy and deep emotional intimacy? The foundation of great leadership and amazing love life is the same -- Self-leadership. CLIMAX: Why Great Leaders Need Love Affairs is a leadership fable of two mediocre leaders who come to a crossroads: either do the inner work to shed the masks and egos or become another statistical casualty by joining the two-thirds of leaders who fail. Learn the root causes of leadership failure that traditional leadership development paradigms and books do not address.

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